Not Just Another Day At The Beach
Today dawned sunny. I did get up briefly before dawn to see if the weather might produce a glorious sunrise, but I could see stars everywhere, so I just went back to bed.
After a bit of a lig, I got up and went mountain biking in the sunshine. It was pleasantly warm and very sunny and I ended up tacking a few extra trails on to my ride as I was enjoying being out in the hills so much. In the end I rode just over 16 miles.
Back home and showered, I only had one definite task for the rest of the daylight hours - go to the library and pick up my library card that I'd signed up for online the other night - yes, I've finally joined the local library.
The library opens at 1pm on Saturdays, and it's almost that as I leave the house to go grab some lunch and then meander to the library on the opposite side of town.
It's warm enough for shorts (as long as you're in the sun) though I am wearing a thin fleece too. I decide to take advantage of the weather and grab myself a carne asada burrito and go eat it at the beach, a favorite pastime of mine on such nice days.
The guy in the burrito store gives me one green and one red salsa container; given my predilection for saving my favorite for last, I decide the first half of the burrito will be consumed with the green salsa, the second half with the red. I'm sat on one of my regular benches overlooking the ocean watching the world go by and I'm just about done with the green salsa half of the burrito when it happens.
I feel my hand jerk and my burrito explodes all over me - what the...? I looked down at the burrito and it looks like a grenade went of in it - there's about 2 inches of tattered tortilla hanging all limply before you get down to what remains of the filling - it looks like one of those sticks of dynamite that just went off in Tom the cat's hands thanks to Jerry the mouse.
I realize that the missing filling is all over my leg, my arm and the floor around the bench. It takes a second to realize that the large seagull that is currently pulling a tight 180 degree turn in front of me was the cause of the explosion. It had swooped in from behind over my right shoulder and attacked my burrito - no idea if it was with its beak or its feet - I assume the former.
As I sit there piecing together what just happened, what seems like a thousand birds of various shapes and sizes suddenly descend on my area - no doubt attracted by the debris field of meat, guacamole and pico de gallo spread over my limbs and the surrounding areas.
I feel like Tippi Hedren waiting outside the schoolroom. The smaller birds (pigeons and sparrows) are encroaching on my space the most brazenly, while about three varieties of seagull, one of which is rather large, are only a little further out - and all of them are inching closer. I wave arms and legs at them to get them to back off, but I feel it's only a matter of time before I end up like Tippi Hedren in the attic, and then boom - another seagull (maybe it was the same one, I didn't get that good a look the first time) appears over the same shoulder and has another go at my burrito.
At this stage I give up, wrap what's left of my lunch back up in its paper bag (it's about to get tossed in the garbage, I'm not going to eat the rest of it - I've no idea what germs or diseases seagulls might have imparted). I get up and leave the area of the bench at which stage there's an avian free for all and within a couple of seconds, all evidence of the debris field is gone.
I spent a while, and three napkins, cleaning up the mess from my extremities, and then I carried on to the library.
Having spent the whole of the journey from the beach to the library and back home again reeking of lunch, I am now changed into new clothes too.
My favorite red salsa never saw the light of day.
After a bit of a lig, I got up and went mountain biking in the sunshine. It was pleasantly warm and very sunny and I ended up tacking a few extra trails on to my ride as I was enjoying being out in the hills so much. In the end I rode just over 16 miles.
Back home and showered, I only had one definite task for the rest of the daylight hours - go to the library and pick up my library card that I'd signed up for online the other night - yes, I've finally joined the local library.
The library opens at 1pm on Saturdays, and it's almost that as I leave the house to go grab some lunch and then meander to the library on the opposite side of town.
It's warm enough for shorts (as long as you're in the sun) though I am wearing a thin fleece too. I decide to take advantage of the weather and grab myself a carne asada burrito and go eat it at the beach, a favorite pastime of mine on such nice days.
The guy in the burrito store gives me one green and one red salsa container; given my predilection for saving my favorite for last, I decide the first half of the burrito will be consumed with the green salsa, the second half with the red. I'm sat on one of my regular benches overlooking the ocean watching the world go by and I'm just about done with the green salsa half of the burrito when it happens.
I feel my hand jerk and my burrito explodes all over me - what the...? I looked down at the burrito and it looks like a grenade went of in it - there's about 2 inches of tattered tortilla hanging all limply before you get down to what remains of the filling - it looks like one of those sticks of dynamite that just went off in Tom the cat's hands thanks to Jerry the mouse.
I realize that the missing filling is all over my leg, my arm and the floor around the bench. It takes a second to realize that the large seagull that is currently pulling a tight 180 degree turn in front of me was the cause of the explosion. It had swooped in from behind over my right shoulder and attacked my burrito - no idea if it was with its beak or its feet - I assume the former.
As I sit there piecing together what just happened, what seems like a thousand birds of various shapes and sizes suddenly descend on my area - no doubt attracted by the debris field of meat, guacamole and pico de gallo spread over my limbs and the surrounding areas.
I feel like Tippi Hedren waiting outside the schoolroom. The smaller birds (pigeons and sparrows) are encroaching on my space the most brazenly, while about three varieties of seagull, one of which is rather large, are only a little further out - and all of them are inching closer. I wave arms and legs at them to get them to back off, but I feel it's only a matter of time before I end up like Tippi Hedren in the attic, and then boom - another seagull (maybe it was the same one, I didn't get that good a look the first time) appears over the same shoulder and has another go at my burrito.
At this stage I give up, wrap what's left of my lunch back up in its paper bag (it's about to get tossed in the garbage, I'm not going to eat the rest of it - I've no idea what germs or diseases seagulls might have imparted). I get up and leave the area of the bench at which stage there's an avian free for all and within a couple of seconds, all evidence of the debris field is gone.
I spent a while, and three napkins, cleaning up the mess from my extremities, and then I carried on to the library.
Having spent the whole of the journey from the beach to the library and back home again reeking of lunch, I am now changed into new clothes too.
My favorite red salsa never saw the light of day.
posted by Tim H at 4:40 PM
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